Nothing To See Here, Just A Guy In The Bronx Walking Into A Bodega With A Giant Raccoon On His Back

You know shit is fucked up when New Yorkers break out of their Stare Ahead And Ignore Everything Around You Mode and are creeped out in a bodega. Everybody there was simply looking to indulge in their favorite vice after a long day of work; whether it was a beer, a Dutch, or a pint of Ben & Jerry’s. Instead this random lunatic walked into their lives with a DIESEL raccoon on his back trying to make a scene. There is no way that isn’t uncomfortable. That’s like carrying a medium sized dog on your back only if said dog had claws that could tear through your throat at any given moment and the DNA of a wild creature. Even the bodega cat didn’t want any of that mutant raccoon, and the bodega cat has seen allllll walks of life.

Usually I associate the Bronx with the Yankees, Arthur Avenue, Big Pun, the zoo, and the first borough I enter that lets me know I am now in the squalor of New York City. But I think giant raccoons may make my Bronx Mount Rushmore after this bodega video and last year’s Bronx Chinese Restaurant video.